HOLD FAST HOPE!

so today i sandwiched attending a funeral in between calling to wish joey a happy birthday in the morning and calling to wish jason a happy birthday at noon. (being a pacific coaster, i figured he'd rather me not call him at 4:45 am his time...) but as i was getting ready for the day and also thinking about the impending birth of ryan and sarah's baby... i found myself meditating on this passage in Ecclesiastes 7:

"a good name is better than precious ointment, and the day of death than the day of birth. it is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting, for this is the end of all mankind, and the living will lay it to heart. sorrow is better than laughter, for by sadness of face the heart is made glad. the heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth. it is better for a man to hear the rebuke of the wise than to hear the song of fools..."

the other night at men's bible study, we were talking about the complacency of normalcy, (say that 5 times fast) and the stunning nature of Revelation 9:20-21. 1/3 of mankind is destroyed, but the living DO NOT repent. they just keep on going...

i'd also been listening quite a bit to the new thrice "live at the house of blues cd" (and watching the dvd). some lyrics have really been sticking out at me... from "broken lungs": "A fire burns beneath Manhattan still we breathe with broken lungs we act like none of this matters is that what we meant when we said that we'd sing what must be sung?" yeah, it's totally possible to be shocked and then to go back to life as normal...

i found myself writing in the margin of my bible, "God, may i not be as obstinate!" and being humbled by the fact that He has opened my eyes to the reality of the gospel!

today, i have come face to face with birth and death; life temporal and life eternal. may my living in the one be always grounded with an eye towards the other!

self examination

i've been reading a book called Death by Love: Letters from the Cross by Mark Driscoll. in the chapter on reconciliation, he had some good stuff about bitterness... its source and some good questions to check ourselves for it:

"bitterness is often unrelated to the magnitude of a sin but is instead correlated to the emotional proximity of the offender. it is also often tied to betrayal. what i mean is this: if a stranger sins against you in a big way, you are unlikely to get bitter. but if a beloved family member or friend sins against you in a little way, you are likely to get bitter because you have opened your heart to that person and have high expectations for the relationship. therefore, those whom you love the most are most likely to provoke your bitterness because their sin rises to the level of betrayal."

am i bitter? questions:

"1. do you continually replay in your mind with great detail a negative past event and dislike for the person(s) involved?
2. do you find yourself continually referring to someone in a pejorative fashion because of some past hurt?
3. do you intentionally avoid certain person(s) because you find yourself becoming continually annoyed or angry in their presence?
4. do you find that your dislike of someone is growing over time?"

*** why is any of this important? remember the words of Hebrews 12:15 "see to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no 'root of bitterness' springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled;" bitterness can cause us to miss God's grace and keeps us from living out of it towards others. bitterness causes trouble. bitterness defiles others.

"for He Himself is our peace, who has made us both one and has broken down in His flesh the dividing wall of hostility" Ephesians 2:14

raising the harvest song

with it being thanksgiving time, we of course have been practicing a couple of "thankful" numbers for choir. the one for sunday morning is an arrangement of "come, ye thankful people, come." well, the arranger must have had some sort of issues that he wanted to take out on the tenors and basses, because after not singing for the first page and a half, we then sing DOUBLE TIME to try to catch up with the ladies. and not just double time... sometimes it's double time with a stutter!

however, redemption comes in the final verse, as we come back to sing together and "more broadly." every week as we finish the song, i find this verse becoming my prayer and all hardships that i had with the arranger long forgotten (fittingly enough, my Bible reading had me at matthew 9:37-38 yesterday as well!). sing it with gusto!!!

even so, Lord, quickly come,
bring Thy final harvest home;
gather Thou Thy people in,
free from sorrow, free from sin,
there, forever purified,
in Thy presence to abide;
come, with all Thine angels come,
raise the glorious harvest home.

amen. come Lord Jesus.

yeah, i'm an emo kid...

or at least i tear up more than your "stereotypical guy" is supposed to...

of course, who says that the stereotypes are correct? i think about when the psalmist says, "my eyes shed streams of tears, because people do not keep your law." (ps. 119:136), or the ephesian elders crying over paul's departure (acts 20:37), or even better, Jesus himself ("Jesus wept" - john 11:35).

so what makes me cry? (and why do i analyze and form lists?)

goodbyes: driving away from my sister's place in jersey, hugging dad at the airport

books: reepicheep sailing away in the voyage of the dawn treader (the best of the lot! imo), a walk to remember, the departure from the grey havens in the return of the king (note: the movie did NOT make me cry)

movies: the scene where julius' eyes meet gary's mom's in the er in remember the titans, pretty much the whole way through we are marshall

songs: hearing taps played at the memorial or veterans' day parades

BUT - being the week it is AND being the son of a tubist... when the drum major salutes and high fives the tubist... something within me swells and the tears begin to fall - yeah - i'm from O-H-I-O:

not what you expect to hear in a message about tithing...

"don't give"

yup, you read that right. today in our pastor's series where he's been covering "back to basics," we came to "what the Bible teaches about tithing." well, because 2 corinthians 9:7 says, "each one must give as he has made up his mind, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver," mark's point was "nothing short of an attitude of gratitude for the salvation that is ours in Jesus Christ should be the motivation for our giving." AND if our motivation is ANYTHING else - guilt, habit, etc. - it is better not to give at all! chew on that one.

never thought of it that way before...

as part of studying Luke this year, i've been reading a commentary by michael wilcock. he makes a great point about luke 15:2 ("and the pharisees and the scribes grumbled, saying, 'this man receives sinners and eats with them.'") - although the pharisees are saying this as a complaint against Jesus, it is the truth of the gospel!

JESUS WELCOMES SINNERS WHO KNOW THEY ARE SINNERS AND HAVE NOWHERE ELSE TO TURN!

hallelujah!

for introspection...

the following is a quote from "death by love: letters from the cross" by mark driscoll:

"the opposite of the gospel is idolatry. idolatry is worshiping someone or something other than God. by worshiping i mean that we make sacrifices (e.g., time, energy, money, emotion, thought) so that we can give ourselves to someone or something because it is our highest priority. everyone is a worshiper for the simple reason that we were made by God to worship and cannot help ourselves. but because we are sinners, we are prone to worship created things rather than God the Creator. romans 1:25 teaches that this is at the root of all paganism/idolatry, saying, 'they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator.' this is a complete inversion of the purpose of our creation, which is to worship God and rule over created things as shown in Genesis 1:26-28. martin luther taught that idolatry is, therefore, not just a sin but rather the sin that is the cause of all other sins..."

i love the way the new underoath albums starts...

the drum track begins and the vocals cry out:

"i'm the desperate and You're the Savior!
i'm the desperate and You're the Savior!"

blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. matthew 5:3

revealed to little children

what a blessing to listen to the 7 year old beside me praying in the prayer meeting tonight:

"thank You Lord that you have given us so much - a home and food and a place to live. help more people to come to know You every day."

amen!

2 deaths and a blown tire

this past week, two men that i knew died suddenly. both of them had had physical problems for a while, but their deaths were still somewhat of a suprise.

the first man was a well to do business man (he even had a doctor for a son). he had lived a hard partying life, and i was a bit suprised that he was only 67, because his body seemed to be much older than that. i have no idea where he stood with the Lord, but the life that i observed, spoke of little hope. he seemed to be a fairly bitter old man.

the other guy was one whose life had been amazingly transformed. he had been a night watchman before his illnesses made him unable to work any longer (and also made his medical bills difficult to pay). although his sister came to our church, he was very anti-God. about 3 years ago, when he was in the hospital his sister had asked us to pray for him. the pastor went to visit him and the church helped him out some with his bills. after he was home and stronger, he began to attend on Sunday mornings (perhaps just out of a sense of gratitude). let me tell you, Jesus got ahold of bill's life! it has been such a joy to see him stand before the church and make a public profession of faith, to hear his childlike prayers of faith at the prayer meeting, and to experience his hunger for God's Word at the men's Bible study. i was shocked when i heard that linda had found him dead on his floor last tuesday, but my very next thought was "Praise You Lord, bill is with You!"

another incident happened to me this past weekend. we were part way to an fca event at ysu, when i suddenly had only 3 good tires on my van. this pretty much ended our trip as we waited for the tow truck to arrive. the saddest part? i had known that the tires were in declining condition, and had even planned to replace them this week. too late, the blowout had already occurred. how many people live putting off their need of Jesus Christ? how many does death suprise unawares? don't push it!

regress is easier than progress

"make progress!" was a phrase that became popular with me a couple of years ago when i was trying to encourage a couple quizzers to keep up a regular schedule of learning. the idea was to move forward, even if it was just a little bit at a time.

since that time, the concept of "progress" (and no i don't mean the pedro the lion e.p.) has been one that has come to mind often, especially because it ties in rather nicely with the tool of a growth plan. a verse that often comes to mind is 1 Timothy 4:15 which says, "practice these things, devote yourself to them, so that all may see your progress."

so i've been trying to get in the habit of doing little things regularly that are helpful to growth (easier said than done, because i can be rather sporadic and undisciplined). moving into my own place has also made this a little bit easier (because i am also easily distracted... and at my house i have no tv or internet).

i've made goals and tried to be more thoughtful (hmmm - i actually do more when i consciously think about it). i've had successes and i've had failures (usually stemming from neglect of thoughtfulness and the aforementioned proclivity to distraction).

one little every day bit of progress this summer was pulling weeds in the garden. maybe i'd only have 5 minutes some days... but i'd get some pulled every day. i was making progress! then i went away to camp for a week, and guess what?!? the weeds had taken over... and stronger than ever.

since that time with the weeds (and yes, the poor old lu song is applicable), i've been thinking through this simple point: it takes effort - thought and energy - to move ahead. progress is not easy. regress? well, that's easy, just stand where you are. i think back to the analogy of walking the wrong way on the airport moving walkway. "standing firm" according to paul in philippians 4:1 relates back to "pressing on" in chapter 3 (cue relient k) - standing still takes me the wrong way.

so for me, for now, i'm thinking of that turtle.... and saying to myself, "MAKE PROGRESS!" (ok, yeah, now we can go to pedro...)



lol... and thus continues my theory that no matter what the subject, i can come up with a musical reference...

prescription for spiritual constipation

so the other night at youth group, we were talking about one of my favorite passages of Scripture - Hebrews 10:19-25 (lol - i actually have soooooo many favorites, it's funny for me to use that phrase as a description), and once again we were making the wordplay joke about "let us" and "lettuce."

well, this morning as i was meditating on that passage again, i thought... "hmmmm - the analogy of roughage and it's benefits to our digestive system can really work here." so i started thinking about constipation, and what we're like when we are experiencing it... uncomfortable, bloated, pained, irritable, frustrated, worried that something's wrong with us... just feeling "not quite right," because our systems aren't functioning properly...

so what did i do? yeah, i came in here and started searching the internet for symptoms of constipation! how did people ever work through their analogies properly before the internet?!?

of course, we all know that one of the first prescriptions that we get for "keeping ourselves regular" is MORE FIBER... so, here's a little Scriptural fiber prescription:

"therefore, brothers, since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that He opened for us through the curtain, that is, through His flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God,

LET US draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water.

LET US hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful.

and LET US consider how to stir one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near."

so what do we do when we have a sense that spiritually things are "just not quite right?"
1. DRAW NEAR TO GOD - the way is opened for us by Jesus' blood!
2. HOLD FAST TO HOPE - God is faithful and He is working!
3. GET TOGETHER WITH OTHER CHRISTIANS - our salvation has brought us into a community of believers, we are not meant to be isolated, but to spur and encourage one another in the faith!

... lol - and thus continues my theory that EVERYTHING in creation, God has made with a view toward us realizing His truth... digestive track - check.

good thought from the conference

apologetics is a word for defending our faith. todd burden from inbounds ministries, who is a basketball coach, was talking about how we need to be good at defense. BUT that defense should always be with a mind towards offense. in this analogy, what is our offense? THE GOSPEL. if i can defend my faith, but can't share the truth of the gospel, i have done NO GOOD! i must ALWAYS keep eternity in sight.

just sharing a sweet quote for thought...

i've been reading "the supremacy of Christ in a postmodern world." i would highly recommend it, as well as the conference messages that make up the book. here's a deep one for ya:

"it's the very nature of joy to be a spontaneous response to something that you value. joy comes to you. it rises spontaneously as witness to what you treasure. and therefore it reveals more authentically than anything else what your treasure is. 'for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also' (matt. 6:21). joy is unique in its capacity to witness to what we treasure." john piper

who'd have guessed?

so we were watching the trailer for the desiring God national pastor's conference (i wish i could be there, but we'll just watch the videos when they're on the web :)). i'm particularly excited for sinclair ferguson and mark driscoll. the irony? as we watched the trailer, i said, "hey, you know what that background music is, don't you?" sadly, neither matt nor mike could tell. matt has the excuse of being just a wee lad who's perhaps too young to remember... mike, however, he was at a bunch of the concerts with me!!! i guess i'm on the cusp of popular culture...



can you tell what it is? here's a beautiful bootleg that brings back so many memories...

you've got alot of nothing to say
you've got alot of hate to spray
you've got alot of nothing to say
yet your life is the meaning of temporary

on the significance of names...

so last wednesday was that annual occurrence when i say to my quiz team... "alright guys, saturday's the first quiz and we've gotta come up with a name!"

everybody started flippin' through luke and we came up with a few interesting ideas... but finally settled on one we were pleased with "sawdust in your brother's eye." now is the time to put that name to good use - the marketing, the quality quizzing, the application...

since allison's already started on the artwork portion, i've been kinda meditating on the application part (since that's the part that's my strength... ok - i like doing the artwork, too) - and i was just thinking back on last year's team and the way it turned out...

onesiphorus. yeah, we settled on that one cause daniel was learning 2 timothy 1, and he said "that sounds like a refreshing dinosaur." real deep. but definitely the kind of logic that could not be defeated at the annual naming conference! (yeah, we all have a kinda warped sense of humor). so throughout the year, our team graffiti tended to be a picture of a poorly drawn dinosaur taking a shower (remember, i had two years of college in an art related field! - and somehow the hand gesture became a sort of shower head motion with the arm and hand). the shirts we made came out pretty sweet and unique, and the shower caps that we wore for the tournament and championship quiz DEFINITELY caused us to sweat!

still, my favorite part was the application... and how'd it come about? bad language skills! onesiphorus... not necessarily easy to say, even tougher to spell... so to help out scorekeepers, i started to pronounce it (wun see for us)... well, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that there are two numbers in there... 1 & 4... and that si is "yes" in spanish... and us, well, that's a plural pronoun. so one day in our team devotion time i shared this verse:

"for all the promises of God find their Yes in Him [Jesus Christ]. that is why through Him that we utter our Amen to God for His glory." 2 corinthians 1:20

there's only 1 si 4 us! it's Jesus! He is the Yes to all the promises of God :) so cool - such a big thought sparked by our wackiness.

hopefully, the sawdust'll take us in a meaningful direction as well!




well, time to get to studying luke...

i like lists (and alliteration)...

our pastor began a series on sunday entitled "back to basics" - about practical things that we do as christians to grow in a life of godliness. well, sunday's messages were about worship - and the real thinker for me came from the statement, "your worship determines your witness" - ie. what i value, treasure, esteem is what i talk about the most... (chew on that one)

the Scripture for the morning message was 1 chronicles 16:23-30 which is part of david's song of thanks when the ark was brought back to jerusalem... what really grabbed me in that passage was the idea of God being praised in "all the earth" and "among the nations" (see previous post "praying for the nations") - how do the nations come to worship Him? through our witness... what is the source of our witness? OUR WORSHIP!

as i glanced back through the entire song of thanks... i noticed that i had numbered stuff at the beginning of it (i like to number lists), 14 imperatives (fancy english class word for commands) that i have spent the last couple of days meditating on:

oh give thanks to the LORD;
call upon His name;
make known His deeds among the peoples!
sing to Him;
sing praises to Him;
tell of all His wondrous works!
glory in His holy name;
let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice!
seek the LORD
and [seek] His strength;
seek His presence continually!
remember the wondrous works that He has done,
[remember] His miracles
and [remember] the judgments He uttered,
2 Chronicles 16:8-12

teach me, O Lord, to worship You aright that the nations may know of Your name! (beginning with my neighborhood)

i walked down the street...

so last november, i moved to my own place (next to my grandparents - to be closer to them when they need stuff and to help them out). of course, this new place is in town, which is quite a change for me... i'm used to my neighbors being pretty much all relatives or cows!

now, it would probably surprise some people just how much of an introvert i am... cause i can totally come out of my shell in situations where i'm comfortable or in ministry situations where i sort of "force outgoing."

anyway, sunday morning was a first for me... i got up early before sunday school and church and just walked down my street. (which was pretty cool cause the river was covered with fog - did i mention that i live right on the river? - and i saw a great blue heron sitting on a rock down by the shore) - but honestly - i was a little nervous about taking that walk. why? there were PEOPLE in those houses... who might SEE me!

so i sit back now and think "wow, what a chicken" (not the first time i've thought of myself in that manner... lol) - and praying "God give me opportunities to reach out to those PEOPLE... my neighbors..."

"for God did not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power, of love and of self-discipline." 2 tim. 1:7

oh, and by the way, who came to speak in sunday school and church... a young missionary serving in east berlin... who shared how much he and his wife have been stretched out of their comfort zones there - but amazed at the opportunities that God has opened up! :)

gotta love our thematic God!

praying for the nations...

first of all, then, i urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people, for kings and all who are in high positions, that we may lead a peaceful and quiet life, godly and dignified in every way. this is good, and it is pleasing in the sight of God our Savior, who desires all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth. 1 timothy 2:1-4

these verses have really been on my heart this week. school has started back up, which means that we're back into the tuesday morning before school at tim horton's thing with myself and some students. last school year, we got into the habit of praying for the country of pakistan - being updated by missionary friends that we know there. it was my prayer that the prayer time together would help the students to grow in their prayer life AND to get a bigger view of the world.

it is so often easy to get self-centered and narrow minded. this was definitely reinforced to me by a pastor friend from zambia who emailed me last week. zambia's president died of a stroke last week, and i had heard nothing of it from u.s. news sources! they must now hold elections within 90 days.

so i'm praying for pakistan - as they replace musharref, zambia - as they look to elect a replacement for mwanawasa, zimbabwe - as election turmoil and suffering continues surrounding mugabe, and the united states as we prepare for the november elections. (and for iraq, afghanistan, iran, georgia, russia, sudan, etc.)

i am prompted by God's command to pray for these leaders. (pleasing God is a good thing ;)) i am encouraged that "there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God." (rom. 13:1) i am expectant that this is all "for the sake of His name among the nations." (rom. 1:3)

after this i looked, and behold, a great multitude that no one could number from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, standing before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, with palm branches in their hands, and crying out with a loud voice, "salvation belongs to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb!" revelation 7:9-10

p.s. a good reminder quote for those of us voting u.s. citizens: "and ye, o peoples, to whom God gave the liberty to choose your own magistrates, see to it, that ye do not forfeit this favor by electing to positions of highest honor, rascals and enemies of God." j. calvin

profound awakenings...

so this morning was one of those mornings when i woke up thinking big... or should i say BIG... (this is not an everyday occurrence)

so it went kinda like this... (remember, my eyes are barely open if at all)

"what is the importance in my knowing God?
to know Him as Creator to the extent that i am His creation
to know Him as Redeemer to the extent that i have been sold as a slave to sin
to know Him as Savior to the extent that i am lost without Him..."

i'm sure that the list could go on... i'd like to embellish it, but i'll just put what i thought... i wonder about the use of the word "extent", but that's what was there... gonna meditate on it awhile and let you know where it goes ;)

begging for fruit and eyes opened to opportunities...

we've been playing tennis as a youth group after sunday evening worship throughout the summer... it is NOT because we are good at tennis. in fact, we could be a traveling comedy act. it is more of a reminder of the lessons that we were learning as we went through the study of 3D evangelism. it became pretty humorous (or amazing) how many opportunities that God opened up for randy pope to share his faith with others through playing tennis.

point is: what do you like? what are you good at? ask God to open doors to be used in those places for His kingdom... ready to share the reason for the hope that you have. it's been interesting the people He's been bringing across my path the last couple weeks. use me God!

joy in heaven

i just came from spendin' an hour or so at the funeral home. one of my grandmother's best friends joined her in heaven the other day. for much of my younger life, phyllis lived in massillon, but i could always tell when she had come to visit gram, 'cause the laughter from the trailer could be heard all the way up at the house... isn't it such a wonderful blessing to have friends that we can share joy with?

i also finished up my 52 week Bible reading plan yesterday... (not bad for starting out in march of '06!) - obviously one of the last things that i read was the end of revelation, and as i was thinking about phyllis and gram in heaven - i was once again meditating on that passage:

"behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be His people, and God Himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away." and He who was seated on the throne said, "behold, i am making all things new." also He said, "write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true." and He said to me, "it is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. to the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment. the one who conquers will have this heritage, and I will be his God and he will be my son." rev. 21:5-7

praise God for those saints that have gone before us, for a sure hope and for His Son who makes it all possible! "precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of His saints." ps. 116:15

so long sweet summer...

got a few minutes of alone time at the park today... matt v. had wanted me to play tennis with him at 9:30, but he didn't show up. so i grabbed my discs and headed for the back 9 where the woods would give me a little time of serenity. i haven't really gotten the chance for any of that since camp. the combo of being behind on sleep, kids excited about memorizing Scripture (3080 verses memorized at camp by the 33 campers - another 100 or so that i've helped with this week), and finding places to watch the olympics in the evening probably explains why i've barely blogged for quite some time.

so as i sit here today and think "WHAT IN THE WORLD DO I HAVE WORTHWHILE TO TYPE?" the thing that strikes me is this: i ran into the park superintendent and his 8 year old son digging a ditch in the middle of the woods. my serenity interrupted by a man who began to pour out his heart to me. wow, God, keep my eyes open! i don't know where the days ahead are headed - summer's leaving, school's about to start, i'm no longer prepping camp messages... but i am excited for what You have in store. bring me opportunities - make me FRUITFUL, O LORD!

an outline - a prayer - "Lord, we want to see!"

i'm getting ready to speak for camp in just over a week... here's some of my notes from the first night's sermon. please pray that God would open eyes to see!

"in their case the god of this world has blinded the minds of unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. for what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, with ourselves as your servants for Jesus' sake. for God, who said, 'let light shine out of darkness,' has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ." 2 corinthians 4:4-6

"in the year that king uzziah died i saw the Lord sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up; and the train of his robe filled the temple. above him stood the seraphim. each had six wings: with two he covered his face, and with two he covered his feet, and with two he flew. and one called to another and said: 'holy, holy, holy is the LORD of hosts; the whole earth is full of his glory!' and the foundations of the thresholds shook at the voice of him who called, and the house was filled with smoke. and i said: 'woe is me! for i am lost; for i am a man of unclean lips, and i dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the LORD of hosts!'" isaiah 6:1-5

"and when he had finished speaking, he said to simon, 'put out into the deep and let down your nets for a catch.' and simon answered, 'master, we toiled all night and took nothing! but at your word i will let down the nets.' and when they had done this, they enclosed a large number of fish, and their nets were breaking. they signaled to their partners in the other boat to come and help them. and they came and filled both the boats, so that they began to sink. but when simon peter saw it, he fell down at Jesus' knees, saying, 'depart from me, for i am a sinful man, O Lord.'" luke 5:4-8

"the knowledge of God and the knowledge of ourselves go together. that is, we never have one without the other. to know God as the sovereign God of the universe is to know ourselves as His subjects, in rebellion against Him. to know God in His holiness is to know ourselves as sinners. to know Him as love is to see ourselves as loved though unlovely. to seek God's wisdom is to see our own foolishness in spiritual things. since God is the only standard by which any of those things can be measured, we do not know anything properly unless we know Him. or to put it in other terms, if we do not know God, we consider ourselves to be sovereign over our own lives, holy, loving, wise, and so on, when in reality we are none of those things." j.m. boice

"Jesus stopped and ordered the man to be brought to him. when he came near, Jesus asked him, 'what do you want me to do for you?' 'Lord, i want to see,' he replied." luke 18:40-41

spurred on by spurgeon

two of the different books i was reading today (yeah, i read a bunch of different books a little at a time in different areas of study towards my personal development goal of finishing two books a month) had good quotes from charles spurgeon that i thought were worth sharing...

"the doctrine of the atonement is to my mind one of the surest proofs of the divine inspiration of Holy Scripture. who would or could have thought of the just Ruler dying for the unjust rebel? this is no teaching of human mythology, or dream of poetical imagination. this method of expiation is only known among men because it is a fact; fiction could not have devised it. God Himself ordained it; it is not a matter which could have been imagined."

"a great change has to be wrought in you, far beyond any power of yours to accomplish, ere you can go in with Christ to the marriage. you must, first of all, be renewed in your nature, or you will not be ready. you must be washed from your sins, or you will not be ready. you must be justified in Christ's righteousness, and you must put on his wedding dress, or else you will not be ready. you must be reconciled to God, you must be made like to God, or you will not be ready. or, to come to the parable before us, you must have a lamp, and that lamp must be fed with heavenly oil, and it must continue to burn brightly, or else you will not be ready. no child of darkness can go into that place of light. you must be brought out of nature's darkness into God's marvelous light, or else you will never be ready to go in with Christ to the marriage, and to be forever with him."

oh, and in case you're interested, here's a good biographical sermon to read or listen to about the life of charles spurgeon.

an old prayer... for the coming year

a big part of my cycle of meditation follows the quiz rotation... so as we move on from galatians, ephesians, philippians, colossians, 1&2 timothy and philemon to luke (and as i have been preparing camp sermons), i've begun reading a commentary on the gospel to supplement the more important activities of actually reading, memorizing and meditating on the gospel...

well, today in my reading, there was a quote from "the 1662 prayer book" - an old prayer, but one that sums up what my prayer is for the upcoming year and our intimate relations with the gospel according to luke:

"Almighty God, who calledst luke the physician, whose praise is in the Gospel, to be an evangelist, and physician of the soul: may it please Thee that, by the wholesome medicines of the doctrine delivered by him, all the diseases of our souls may be healed through the merits of Thy Son Jesus Christ our Lord."

AMEN!

bless the LORD

so my Scripture reading today had me in psalm 134-136. they can kinda be summed up like this: 134 - bless the LORD. 135 - praise the LORD. 136 - give thanks to the LORD (for His steadfast love endures forever).

the last two are pretty straightforward, but the one that gave me pause is the first one, "bless the LORD." i was struck by the question, "how can i bless the LORD?" who am i to bless the God of the universe? what is it that He could need from me?

well, i decided to do a bit of digging... seems the hebrew word is "barak" (which is a great help if you know hebrew). the common english translation is "to bless, to kneel." that is a little helpful... part of my following through on this command is the concept of kneeling - an acknowledging of subordination and servanthood.

but i kept thinking about that word "bless." it's one of those words that i can toss around and use contextually, but do i really know what it means? hence, dictionary.com came in handy. here's what i found: "to honor as holy, to glorify: bless the LORD."

still a lot more thinking and meditating to do, but it's a definite start... me blessing Him is about proper placement. "He must become greater, i must become less." oh LORD, be foremost in my thoughts today that i might honor and glorify YOU through everything that i do!

oh, and another thought...

the glorious colors of spring: what a vivid celebration of new life after the bleakness and death of winter! how cool is it that God puts pictures of eternal reality into every part of creation?

Creator God, creative God

what a great day to be out driving around taking in the sights (except for the cost of gasoline...)! on our way up the river to pittsburgh, it was amazing to see all the brilliant colors... dogwoods - pink and white, the blazing yellow of forsythia, the bright purple of lilacs, azaleas beginning to bloom in various shades and other trees and shrubs i don't have the slightest idea of their names all in glorious brilliance...

oftentimes, i have wished that i was more artistic than i am... my eyes take in the sunset, but my box of crayons falls short of capturing it on paper... i see the vast african plains and wildlife, and my camera tells but a small bit of the story... so when i DO see someone who has more art skills than me, who CAN communicate some of the granduer, i am highly impressed and appreciative...

FAR greater, beyond the skill of the artist who can recreate the beauty of what is, is the skill of the Artist who created originally... who thought of the orange of sunsets and the fading of the blue into black of night, who spoke colors into existence in trees and flowers and shrubs, who uses a wider range than even the largest crayola box... HE is the one worthy of all praise, HE is the one to be awed at and worshiped - today i was reminded... praise You God for color!

overcoming our bent toward blindness for the wonders of the ordinary

these are 11 resolutions from a lecture by clyde kilby as quoted in "when i don't desire God" by john piper (also where i got the title of this post):

1. at least once every day i shall look steadily up at the sky and remember that i, a consciousness with a conscience, am on a planet traveling in space with wonderfully mysterious things above m and about me.

2. instead of the accustomed idea of a mindless and endless evolutionary change to which we can neither add nor subtract, i shall suppose the universe guided by and Intelligence which, as aristotle said of greek drama, requires a beginning, a middle and an end. i think this will save me from the cynicism expressed by bertrand russell before his death, when he said: "there is darkness without and when i die there will be darkness within. there is no splendor, no vastness anywhere, only triviality for a moment, and then nothing."

3. i shall not fall into the falsehood that this day, or any day, is merely another ambiguous and plodding twenty-four hours, but rather a unique event filled, if i so wish, with worthy potentialities. i shall not be fool enough to suppose that trouble and pain are wholly evil parentheses in my existence but just as likely ladders to be climbed toward moral and spiritual manhood.

4. i shall not turn my life into a thin straight line which prefers abstractions to reality. i shall know what i am doing when i abstract, which of course i shall often have to do.

5. i shall not demean my own uniqueness by envy of others. i shall stop boring into myself to discover what psychological or social categories i might belong to. mostly i shall simply forget about myself and do my work.

6. i shall open my eyes and ears. once every day i shall simply stare at a tree, a flower, a cloud, or a person. i shall not then be concerned at all to ask what they are but simply be glad that they are. i shall joyfully allow them the mystery of what lewis calls their "divine, magical, terrifying and ecstatic" existence.

7. i shall sometimes look back at the freshness of vision i had in childhood and try, at least for a little while, to be, in the words of lewis carroll, the "child of the pure unclouded brow, and dreaming eyes of wonder."

8. i shall follow darwin's advice and turn frequently to imaginative things such as good literature and good music, preferably, as lewis suggests, an old book and timeless music.

9. i shall not allow the devilish onrush of this century to usurp all my energies but will instead, as charles williams suggested, "fulfill the moment as the moment." i shall try to live well just now because the only time that exists in just now.

10. if for nothing more than the sake of a change of view, i shall assume my ancestry to be from the heavens rather than from the caves.

11. even i if i turn out to be wrong, i shall bet my life in the assumption that this world is not idiotic, neither run by an absentee landlord, but that today, this very day, some stroke is being added to the cosmic canvas that in due course i shall understand with joy as a stroke made by the architect who calls Himself Alpha and Omega.

...good stuff to read over slowly and to let it sink in.

i guess it's some kinda surfing terminology...

so the other night on the way home, i popped "the legend of chin" into the cd player. i was reminded that i hadn't listened to it in awhile (since i was only partways able to sing along with the lyrics), and i thought to myself, "you know what? that switchfoot band might just become popular." as i reminisced, i realized that wasn't always the common belief around here...

why did i originally purchase "the legend of chin"? well, because they were playing at the ATF we were going to attend. that was back in the day when sarah was traveling with them doing drama and such (atf, not switchfoot). i don't particularly enjoy concerts when i don't know the songs (or maybe i should say - i particularly enjoy concerts more when i DO know the songs), so mike and i made a trip up to family in boardman and purchased said cd (this was pre heaven on earth and pre switchfoot cds at wal-mart AND when gasoline cost less than today for a trip to boardman). i liked it (particulary, "might have ben hur".... "this one goes out to charlton heston"... he died last week). many others were disappointed that switchfoot was to be the atf band, because AUDIO ADRENALINE was playing at the other atf's, and they were a band everybody knew. poor switchfoot... most of our group went to the merch tables and the restrooms rather than listen to them play. sorry guys, we were meant to live for so much more...

but wow, that's been so long ago now... jerome has joined switchfoot, the kiddies we took to atf are all grown up and my facebook friends, and the only place i could find a video including ben hur has this guy talking about pandas and cats and then lip syncing it in tons of craziness... oh well, i still like the song.

the cranberries and the mercy of the Lord

you know how there are certain songs that when they start playing, you just like singing them to your sister just for the reaction? like "benny and the jets"? and she can get so annoyed by you going "benny" "benny" "BENNY"... ok, so maybe you don't, but another song that i would always run to sarah's room when it would come on was "linger" by the cranberries... haha - i always just got a kick out of trying to sing like her (dolores o'riordan - i just looked it up... yup, sis, one i didn't know).

well, this morning's sermon was out of genesis 19 where God destroys sodom and gomorrah:

"as morning dawned, the angels urged lot, saying, 'up! take your wife and your two daughters who are here, lest you be swept away in the punishment of the city.' but he lingered. so the men seized him and his wife and his two daughters by the hand, the LORD being merciful to him, and they brought him out and set him outside the city." gen. 19:15-16

when i read the word "lingered", i started to think of the cranberries song and the words "you know i'm such a fool for you, you've got me wrapped around your finger." (i am TOTALLY fighting the urge to type it out the way that she sings it!) and it's true, often i AM a fool for the world, and i DO linger...

so i say, "praise God for His mercy! that He comes to seize me by the hand and bring me out of terrible places and sin that can be so deceiving. forgive me, Lord, for becoming enamored with this world and its ways. bring me to my senses, i pray. help me to love YOU more!"

did charles wesley ever drive across I-80?

O, for a thousand tongues to sing
My great Redeemer’s praise
The glories of my God and King
The triumphs of His grace

My gracious Master and my God
Assist me to proclaim
To spread through all the earth abroad
The honors of Thy name

So come on and sing out
Let our anthem grow loud
There is one great love Jesus

Jesus, the name that charms our fears
That bids our sorrows cease
‘Tis music in the sinner’s ears
‘Tis life and health and peace

He breaks the power of cancelled sin
He sets the prisoners free
His blood can make the foulest clean
His blood availed for me

He speaks and listening to His voice
New life the dead receive
The mournful broken hearts rejoice
The humble poor believe

Glory to God and praise and love
Be ever, ever giv’n
By saints below and saints above
The church in earth and Heav’n

There are so few words
That never grow old
There are so few words
That never grow old
Jesus

crowder was singing it on the cd and it sure seemed appropriate as we were driving into the setting sun on saturday night. what a glorious sight! a book i was recently reading talks about how dogs have trouble understanding when we point at things. they tend to want to check out our hands rather than looking at what we are really pointing to. may i never miss to WHOM the beauty in creation points: the heavens declare the glory of GOD. i praise Him for the setting sun and the orange sky... for from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. to Him be the glory forever!

what's it really all about?

when asked what the most important commandment was, Jesus' reply was "love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. the second is this: love your neighbor as yourself. there is no other commandment greater than these."

this can be seen as a definition of the well ordered life AND the well ordered ministry. sin, however, gets this proper order all jumbled. instead of loving God and loving others, too often, i love me and then me. i need constant reminding that it's not about me.

so what more explosive reminder can there be than to have the cake cutting at my birthday party (a celebration of me) interrupted by a phone call from a friend to tell me that he is dying? praise God! it's all about HIM! (and the lives that He allows me to touch springing from the reality of who He is.) i am reminded of a quote that struck me as we were studying ch. 9 of "don't waste your life" the other day:

"if your aim is to love people, you will lay down your life to make them eternally glad in God. and if your aim is to glorify Christ, you will also lay down your life to make people eternally happy in God... any good-hearted goal, without the desire to give people eternal joy in God, is condemnation with a kind face."

life is short - sometimes even shorter than we expect. thank You God for the privilege of serving You - for being the One Hope in my life - help me to love You more and to lay down my life pointing others to You!

i'm no franklin d...

on a national scale, december 7, is the day that lives in infamy, but on a more personal level that day'd be march 28. it is the day in 1986 when i lost my appendix, and more importantly, the day in 2002 when i lost my grandmother.

i was reminded again on sunday just how good God is and how well He works everything out. the Easter message was from 1 corinthians 15: the resurrection - Christ's and ours - our hope.

march 27, 2002 was maggie's birthday, and rachel and i finished off memorizing 1 corinthians 15 - leaving us one chapter to do before nationals. little did i realize the comfort that passage would bring to me over the course of the next several days - even becoming the passage that i would use to preach on at gram's funeral.

2 timothy 1:5 talks about timothy's faith being passed down from his mother and grandmother. i can sure identify with him. my grandmother was my best friend, and the one who would teach me the Scriptures - from the basic truths as a little boy to helping me memorize for quizzing all the way through my high school years. my mom is the one who had devotions with us as kids and who would walk the pastures listening to me quote.

today, my passion remains to help kids learn Scripture, and gram is more than just a little bit responsible for that. because she took the time with me, i was memorizing with rachel that day, and today justin and i finished ephesians 3. what a blessing to have interaction with God's life transforming Word and young people. (more on that subject in my latest newsletter).

oh, and to reinforce the idea of hope in resurrection... check out the song victory by some guys who i know that have a band called zimri... (i've been singing it ever since sunday - but this wasn't quite how the pastor sounded ;))

maundy

yeah, so the "haha, is it monday OR thursday?" joke gets old. but when mike and i were talking about it yesterday, we couldn't come up with a good answer... like we know what Maundy Thursday is, but not necessarily where the name comes from. soooooooo, i turned to my old friend(ok, so we've only really been friends for maybe two years), wikipedia for an answer.

well, it turns out that it comes from the first word of the latin phrase, "Mandatum novum do vobis ut diligatis invicem sicut dilexi vos." if you are like me, that means nothing to you. BUT when you realize that that latin phrase is john 13:34, which Jesus spoke to His disciples at the last supper right after judas had gone out, it seems to be a little more important. AND when we see it in english (for those of us who read and understand that language), it makes a lot more sense:

"a new commandment i give to you, that you love one another: just as i have loved you, you also are to love one another. by this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." john 13:34-35

so tonight, as we celebrate the Lord Jesus - His washing of His disciples' feet, His celebration of the Passover with His disciples, His body and His blood given for us - may we consider anew the fact that we have no life apart from Christ AND that by participation in His body (His life within us), we become a part of His body - the church - and may we also celebrate and love each other as a demonstration of Christ's life.

those are big thoughts - i'm blown away to consider them. i may and or may not be expressing them entirely, thoroughly, but i wanted to get them down while they are there... i'll probably come back and edit some after further meditation, but i hope that as they are they can be a blessing to you.

oh, and on the theme theme... what did my Bible reading plan have for me today? (remembering that it skips around throughout the week and that i am nowhere near on track with the exact day of reading) - 2 chronicles 30! (lol - "big deal" you say) - well, yeah, cause it's about hezekiah reinstituting the observance of the passover!

brothers in arms

unless you have woken at 4 AM to discover a squirrel sitting on your knee as you lie in your bed, you will probably not completely understand the connection that i have recently discovered with david crowder and the swedish chef. i have always (ok, not always, but for the length of my association with the knowledge of them) considered them geniuses and incredibly funny, but i now realize that it goes FAR DEEPER...







disclaimers:

• crowder and i do differ on the dr. pepper... (it makes me puke just to swallow it - i guess you could call that an aversion)
• at pirate games, when they do the intro... we like to yell, "there be squirrels ahead!"
• i do get along with one squirrel:

"have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they produce" sq... er, "quarrels." 2 timothy 2:23

slick shoes!

as mike and i were walking out of the pittsburgh youth network meeting last week, i said to him, "i think i'm in a slick shoes mood." so i popped the biggest and the best into the player and it's been steady there for the last week. who would have known that last saturday was their first show in their reunited state? and that you can find vids from it on youtube? (i had heard a while back that the original members were getting back together - i guess now's the time) :) (oh, and you'll have to trust me, but i can sing along better on "for better or for worse" than the crowd at that show)



the songs? fall & for better or for worse:

"fall"

Lord I'm distracted by so many things of the world. My eyes always stray from you, but you are always watching over me. I don't know how you could stand having me as your son. I'm always so selfish and you are always so kind. Lord, you're always there for me. Without you I don't know what I would do. You're always there for me, without you I don't know what I would do. When everything is going well I rarely stop and thank you. But, when nothing is going right I stop and complain to you. Don't let me fall.

"for better or for worse"

Sitting alone, in the rain, one day you came and sat by me. When I looked up, you just smiled and said hello and I saw your pretty face. I never knew what it would be. I never knew you'd care for me. When I think of how it's changed, for better or worse, we'll have to see. All those times you looked at me that way. And I know everything will be o.k. Thinking of your smile, it hurts to see you cry. All those times that you were sad, you never told me why. I know that we are still growing, not knowing what's to come. But only God knows what He has in store for us.

...oh yeah, and remember that they got their name from this kid's line in the goonies?

thematic progressions

i don't know if you're like me, but it sure seems that things or ideas pop up in my life in various places in groupings. hmmmm - that may be the most confusing sentence ever written, so allow me to explain: when i learn about subject 'a' in place 1, the chances are that i will also hear about subject 'a' in place 2 and sometimes even place 3 or place 4. now, it could be that i notice these things because that is how my brain works - analytically in groupings and comparisons OR because the Lord knows that i need repetition to really get His point - like, yesterday's theme was saul/paul's conversion, which came up in three totally separate instances...

well, today's theme is what i've chosen to write about: grace. one of the websites i usually check out semi regularly is decapolis (as well as espn, bbc africa, desiring God, the pirates, only bucs forum and manchild insider) (oh, and i guess jjhuddle during high school football season and cbd when i'm looking for a book). ANYWAY, today on decapolis, they had a link to the new video by the almost. when i saw it, i remembered that the lead singer was in underOath as well, but i couldn't remember his name... so i headed to wikipedia (or the W as david crowder refers to it - i guess i go there quite a bit, too).

well, after reading the article (and remembering that his name is aaron gilespie), i went to their myspace page to listen to the song "say this sooner" which i was trying to remember if i'd heard. i wound up also listening to the song "amazing, because it is" which was seeming really catchy. then it bursts into the words from "amazing grace," and the title just totally made sense. haha - we sing AMAZING grace, because God's grace IS amazing! He saved a WRETCH like me...

so then i went to my Bible reading for the day - james 4 - and it was talking about our sinfulness and worldliness and how "friendship with the world is enmity with God." the turning point? verse 6 "but he gives us more grace."!!!!! to the humble... to those who recognize their hopeless, desperate, needy situation.

then today's prayer for the quiz team - from ephesians 3 - that "out of his GLORIOUS RICHES he would strengthen you" - and i was reminded of studying chapter 1 yesterday and remembered that those "glorious riches" are the "riches of God's grace." (eph. 1:6-8)

praise God - His grace IS amazing and i am desperately in need of it!



...sistrina - i think this is a sufficient number of links.... jenn franks - this covers the whole question of a song that sums me up right now ;)

'c' is for cookie

i finished reading habakkuk this morning, and no, i am not merely typing this blog because the name "habakkuk" is fun to say. (besides, it's much cooler in swahili, where the spelling is "habakuki" - which totally eliminates the way we oftentimes try to pronounce it and forces us to sound like we are offering someone a snack... 'ha ba cookie'?)

anyway, habakkuk starts out the book complaining. no, not about his name, but about wickedness and how the wicked prosper... but by the end of the book he's talking like this:

"though the fig tree should not blossom,
nor fruit be on the vines,
the produce of the olive fail
and the fields yield no food,
the flock be cut off from the fold
and there be no herd in the stalls,
yet i will rejoice in the LORD;
i will take joy in the God of my salvation.
GOD, the Lord, is my strength;
he makes my feet like the deer's;
he makes me tread on my high places." hab 3:17-19

what changed the complaining to patient trust and joy? habakkuk got his eyes on God instead of the problems... he saw "His splendor... His brightness... His hand... His power." sometimes, an attitude change is as simple as a change of gaze.

i also used some of yesterday's "stuck inside because of ice and snow" to read part of "the God who is there" by francis schaefer. i think that in a way, the following quote ties in nicely with the point this blog is trying to make:

"the new theology... knows nothing of man being created in the image of God, nor of God revealing Himself truly in the Scriptures... probably the best way to describe this concept of modern theology is to say that it is faith in faith, rather than faith directed to an object which is actually there... modern man's faith turns inward. in christianity the value of faith depends upon the object towards which the faith is directed. so it looks outward to the God who is there, and the Christ who in history died upon the cross once for all, finished the work of atonement and on the third day rose again in space and in time. this makes christian faith open to verification and discussion."

so yeah... look at situations, look to me... depression/complaining. look to God... rejoicing/patient endurance.

"O LORD, i have heard the report of you, and your work, O LORD, do i fear. in the midst of the years revive it; in the midst of the years make it known; in wrath remember mercy." hab 3:2

show me the way

I've been starting to think through camp messages. (Seeing as it's been 12 years since I've been the speaker - which means anyone who was in 5th grade when I last spoke is now at least 3 years out of high school - it seems to be a good time for me to speak again.) Our theme is 'Lost and Found,' so I have been meditating along those lines.

Well, as I think about myself and my biggest life frustrations, they generally have to do with lostness. Frustration #1 is when I can't find something. I am a man on a mission until it is found. It drives me nuts.

The specific situations that I was thinking of more, however, have to do with driving - and not nuts, but lost. I take pride (warning warning) in knowing where I am going. Ever since I was young on family trips, I was the one who got to read the maps for my dad and be his navigator, because I was good at it.

I'm still pretty good with the whole geography thing. God has brought some situations into my life to teach me lessons, though. Things to say, "Hey boy, cut the pride out, 'cause you don't know where you are. You don't know as much think you do." I can think specifically of a time when our team in Malawi got an SB, because I got us lost in the bush trying to get back from the lake, or when we got lost in Pittsburgh driving back from ATF, or when we followed mapquest perfectly and wound up at the end of a runway for a small county airport in Columbia, SC. Probably the thing that drove me most nuts was that I had others FOLLOWING ME, but I WAS LOST.

Well, I'd been meditating on that thought and just confessing pride (cause it's something easy for me to fall into) and asking God's direction, when I picked up my notebook that I'd been jotting in during my 52-week Bible reading plan (which I've nearly completed some 100 weeks later!), and I found some verses I'd jotted down nearly two years ago:

"Therefore the LORD waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the LORD is a God of justice; blessed are all those who wait for him. For a people shall dwell in Zion, in Jerusalem; you shall weep no more. He will surely be gracious to you at the sound of your cry. As soon as he hears it, he answers you. And though the Lord give you the bread of affliction, yet your Teacher will not hide himself anymore, but your eyes shall see your Teacher. And your ears shall hear a word behind you saying, 'This is the way, walk in it,' when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left." Isaiah 30:18-21

Isn't it SO COOL??? Even when I'm lost, God knows the way. And even when I foolishly think that I'm the one in the lead, I need reminded, I'm just to follow Jesus. As long as I do that, I won't be leading ANYONE astray. He must become greater, I must become less.

Save the CD

Yeah, he cracks me up big time.

so i'll probably wind up getting "health and sport"

so the guy keeps knocking on the door across the street and peering in through the glass as if someone will finally come to let him in.... i have noticed this same activity over the course of 3 or 4 hours... i'm not quite sure if he gives up for random intervals, but he seems to be there whenever i take a moment to notice...

today started much like any monday of post-camp trip analysis (note that this is DRIPPING with irony and sarcasm)... drawing on the chalkboard and feeling glee that someone had recognized my statue of liberty, thus realizing that the other lines symbolized the tip of manhattan and the jersey coast (if you really call what lies along the hudson river a "coast") - thankfully, i'd gone to bed WAY early last night and was wide awake for the first period mission trip presentation to the juniors and seniors... just kinda going over some of the basics and whetting their appetites to become involved in the details...

at the office, i started to check the main internetty things which i do and discovered a couple of embedded videos on decapolis which caught my attention... one for the song "closer arrows" by monarch which was cleverly done - the other was a trailer for an upcoming documentary put together by ben stein (yeah, the guy from ferris buhler and win ben stein's money) - intriguingly, it's about how scientists have been ostracized in the scientific community for putting forth the possibility of a Creator God...

meanwhile, i'd left open a tab to northern records (the label for monarch) - and noticed a link for a podcast by the band luxury - so i started listening to it... since luxury is definitely on my list of top 5 favorite acts out of georgia (along with mars ill, joe christmas, dear ephesus and third day)... well, as i listened to the song "shake more hands, give more hugs", i remembered that i had never purchased their album which they put out on northern in 2005 (some 6 years after their previous album)... hmmm - i always loved to sing the falsetto with them and sarah always hated when i did...

anyhow, as i thought about the lyrics and my general proclivity toward introversion, i was reminded once again to thank God for bringing Jon Price and i together at pyn and him asking about snow camp (i probably would have never gotten kids together to go if i wouldn't have known anybody there)... so God's still working to get us where He wants us to be - even those of us too scared for our own good... and yes, He's not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power, of love and self-discipline... so i'll keep working to "shake more hands, give more hugs"

I will try to be more fun
Tell a joke or lie in the sun
Shake more hands and give more hugs
Smile like I did when I was young

For I don't want to die
Without a smile

It's the little things that make our lives this way
It's the sadness of every day
But I'll try to sing more happily and not ruin your day

...and yes, interestingly enough, i started this blog with the thought that "all the randomness does still come back to a point..."

one more for good measure...

just to continue the point from the last blog, here's a verse from the section of psalm 119 that i was learning today:

"my eyes shed streams of tears, because people do not keep your law."

hmmmm - is that MY reaction? what does our reaction to sin in the world say about our view of God's law? what does our view of God's law say about our view of HIM? how do psalm 69 and romans 15 put it... "the insults of those who insult you have fallen on me." help me to love you more, Lord.

call me an emo kid, but i saw a gorgeous sunrise this morning

it rose with an orangy glow over the snow covered west virginia hills, the fake power plant clouds and the icy river.... i was like "oh, that's really cool" temporarily forgetting how cold i was digging in my pocket for my van keys

well, as i drove out the road... i was thinking about my reaction - i noticed the beauty, but was i REALLY all that moved by it? and is it really so rare for me to notice such things? am i really so oblivious to the world around me and the grandeur of God? it's kinda like when g.k. chesterton said, "the amazing thing about people's funny noses is not that the noses are funny, but that they have noses at all!" when i first heard that quote, i thought, "you're right... God has created an AMAZING air filtration system that is constantly in front of my face but i BARELY think about it!"

so it's valentine's day, that emotional centerpiece of our calendar, and i'm driving along having this internal discussion about really noticing and feeling, and my heart being moved, etc. and i started to think about some of the verses i've been memorizing in psalm 119:

"my soul is CONSUMED WITH LONGING for Your rules at all times"

"HOT INDIGNATION seizes me because of the wicked, who forsake Your law."

"my FLESH TREMBLES for fear of You, and i am afraid of Your judgments."

"i open my mouth and PANT, because i long for Your commandments."

and i think, wow, these are strong emotional and physical reactions to God's truth by the psalmist. THAT is how i want to be. i want to see. i want to feel. God, help me. make me AWARE. OPEN my eyes. MOVE my heart!

And He set me on fire, and I am burning alive.
With His breath in my lungs I am coming undone.
And he set me on fire and I am burning alive.
With his breath in my lungs I am coming undone.
And I cannot hold it in and remain composed.
Love's taken over me and so I propose the letting myself go.
I am letting myself go.

You are my joy.
You are my joy.
You are my joy.
You are my joy.

(i get to see crowder in one week :) )

acting my age

i don't really pay attention to age that much. in fact, i can distinctly remember a time last week when i was stating what my age was and in the back of my head thought, "wait, is that right?" some people fixate on their age, not me. ironically, today's blog is going to spring out of how old i am....

i was reading today in 2 chronicles 21 about jehoram... not one of your "good kings of judah." his dad was jehoshaphat - a good king, his grandad was asa - a good king... jehoram, on the other hand, once he got on the throne and established his kingdom, "killed all his brothers with the sword and also some of the princes of israel" (guess he just tossed that second part in for good measure), he married one of ahab's daughters, built high places in judah, and led the inhabitants of jerusalem into whoredom AND made judah go astray...

let's just say that this guy was so bad that elijah, whose main ministry was in wicked israel (with ahab and such), wrote him a letter... i'll paraphrase... "you've been wicked (unlike your father and grandfather), so you're gonna be cursed and your family, too... oh, and your intestines are gonna come out."

well, the ethiopians and the philistines got mad... came and took all his stuff and his wives and sons (except the youngest) "after all this the LORD struck him in his bowels with an incurable disease. in the course of time, at the end of two years, his bowels came out because of the disease and he died in great agony.... he was thirty-two years old when he began to reign, and he reigned eight years in jerusalem. and he departed with no one's regret."

wow.

why am i writing this? well, i'm 32. jehoram sure made a wreck of the next 8 years of his life. hurting lots of people around him and suffering excruciating pain. (i will believe the Scripture when it says "great agony," having never really had a case of my bowels coming out). and nobody was sad that he died.

my prayer is that i will live differently. God help me to be a proverbs 3:5-8 man over the next 8 years (or however many You give me).

"trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. be not wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD, and turn away from evil. it will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones."

i'm guessing that long titles are in, or else i am out...

so i've been doing a study throughout this year, and i'm kinda working at putting it together as a compilation...

as we've been doing some of it in youth group, we've entitled the segment "learning to pray from the pauline epistles," but i think that i have now settled on the title "a guide to prayer for fellow believers based on paul's prayers for the churches throughout his various epistles"

kinda long, but you get the idea of what it is right up front... there is SOOOOOOO much cool stuff there, and it has been a real guide for me. i think that compiling it all together will help to take it to the next level for thoughtful meditation and prayer.

as i was thinking about this post, i was reminded of a really good book that i read awhile back by thomas watson entitled "Heaven Taken by Storm: Showing the Holy Violence a Christian Is to Put Forth in the Pursuit After Glory". he was a puritan author. i guess long titles WERE cool then, or else maybe he wasn't cool either. hmmm - i'm guessing that puritans didn't really care about being cool. i probably shouldn't either. anyhow, if you ever need a good read - this is it. short book, packed with power.

old guys who said it well...

just thought i'd share a couple of quotes that were included in the chapter "wielding the Word in the fight for joy" from "when i don't desire God." these were especially helpful, because i was reading them as the new year dawned (or like within a week of it... it's not like i was up that early on new year's day reading to greet the daylight). the new year is a good time for me to refocus, revise my growth plan and to work at redeveloping good habits. anyhow, to the quotes...

"it is blessed to eat into the very soul of the Bible until, at last, you come to talk in scriptural language, and your spirit is flavored with the words of the Lord, so that your blood is Bibline and the very essence of the Bible flows from you."
charles spurgeon

...i think he made up the word "bibline" - but it's cool and descriptive, so that's ok

"now... i would give a few hints to my younger fellow-believers as to the way in which to keep up spiritual enjoyment. it is absolutely needful... we should read regularly through the Scriptures, consecutively, and not pick out here and there a chapter. if we do, we remain spiritual dwarfs. i tell you so affectionately. for the first four years after my conversion i made no progress, because i neglected the Bible. but when i regularly read on through the whole with reference to my own heart and soul, i directly made progress. then my peace and joy continued more and more. now i have been doing this for 47 years. i have read through the whole Bible about 100 times and i always find it fresh when i begin again. thus my peace and joy have increased more and more."
george mueller

"Bible memorization is absolutely fundamental to spiritual formation. if i had to choose between all the disciplines of the spiritual life, i would choose Bible memorization, because it is a fundamental way of filling our mind with what it needs. this book of the law shall not depart out of your mouth. that's where you need it! how does it get in your mouth? memorization."
dallas willard

"my beloved... work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure. Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life..."
philippians 2:12-16

hey steve, go for it in 2008, get back to the basics. <--- subliminal message to me

(i'm back at memorizing psalm 119 - 10 days in 40 verses down :) - 132 to go - so rich!!!)

john steinbeck

yeah, i just wanted to make a joke about the best laid plans...

actually, it's such a release to just rest in the fact that God is in control - to trust Him and to watch where He takes me. i'm really trying to be consciously immersing myself in the Word as 2008 starts, as well as trying to be sure to be reading good stuff. it all becomes "good spillage."

the crazy part becomes the "who." just thinking about the ones that i'm getting the opportunity to minister to (or more accurately to be used as a conduit for ministry - a pen in the hand, as we've discussed). perhaps not the ones that i'd planned, or even the "big numbers." lemme tell ya, though, i'm excited to see where God's taking me!

God, help me to have an awareness of Your leading. make me an instrument useful for Your service!

just a short "PRAISE THE LORD"

or Bwana Asifiwe for you swahili speakers...

i'll probably have more detailed thoughts later... and probably a whole "new year's" post (with lots more ellipses), but for now i just want to praise God for a wonderful family time over the weekend - celebrating the oneness that we have in Christ - may God use us mightily in the coming year!